Hummer H3

The Hummer H3 is a brilliant car in many ways.

My first week was spent in a yellow standard-trim Hummer H3 with the second week finishing in a gunmetal grey Luxury variant. Karl had his way in the H3 Luxury in Perth and spent his time off-road. Before I begin, let me go over the treatment of the Hummer by some Brisbanites.

There is no denying that all 4WD/SUVs attract a certain amount of attention from those more worried about saving the planet than personal hygiene. The Hummer though, takes this to an extreme level.

From the few who see the Hummer as the vehicle used by the US army to invade sovereign states to those that think every single minute a Hummer is allowed out, a fluffy penguin dies in the north pole, the ignorance of some citizens is astounding।

Driving the Hummer is almost intoxicating. There is nothing like the menacing stance of the beast. The number of people pointing at the car (especially in yellow) far outnumbered any car I’ve driven before (excluding the Lambo).

Hummer uses the slogan “Now get lost” for their advertising campaign and whilst I think the H3 is a little friendlier than that, it does reflect its attitude.

Behind the wheel you will find a high driving position overlooking a massive flat bonnet (which looks superb in yellow). Getting comfortable is not that hard, simply adjust the seat and steering wheel (which really needs to be telescopic). Remember, this car is made for Americans, so we should all be able to fit.

Turn the key and the five-cylinder engine comes to life. With 180kW @ 5600rpm and 328Nm @ 4600rpm, the Hummer seems underpowered on paper and with a kerb weight of 2178kg, it’s not the quickest SUV on the road.

The clutch is essentially like a normal car and the whole gear changing process is no different to your average Corolla. If you know how to drive a manual, buy the manual - avoid the auto.

The four-speed auto gearbox is nothing special and certainly not worth the extra $2,000 cost on the base model (Luxury variants come standard with auto). Gear changes are quick and seamless, but power is noticeably reduced.

You’re not going to be doing much city traffic driving in a Hummer, well, you shouldn’t be, so I’ll say it again, buy the manual.

While the 180kW engine does a decent job, there is an obvious desire for more power and with rumours of V8 versions coming to Australia next year (with a possibility of a diesel as well) - it may be wise to wait a little longer. However if you’re the type that waits till Tuesday to fill up, the V8 isn’t for you.

Hummer says the H3 manual will use about 13.7L/100km for combined city/highway driving, with the auto coming it at 14.5L/100km. I found the figure slightly closer to 14.5L/100km for the manual, and about 16L/100km for the auto.

Driving around a different car every week makes you realise just how sensitive some people are to certain cars, but you get used to it… or so I thought.

The abuse I copped in the Aston Martin V8 Vintage and the Lamborghini Mucielago LP640 to the “you need to think about a smaller car” comment from an elderly citizen when I was in the Volvo XC90, do not even come close to colourful abuse endured in the Hummer.

To cut a long story short, the Hummer got egged। Yes, some idiots egged the Hummer, but best of all, they had the audacity to stuff a few save the planet flyers in the spare tyre.

As a result idiots found the need to bombard the passenger side with at least 6 eggs. Many motorists fail to realise that the car is essentially the size of any other SUV. Sure it looks big, but it really isn’t. It’s actually easier to drive than the majority of similar sized vehicles.

Fortunately for every idiot that thought hurling abuse at me would cut CO2 emissions, there was someone that gave me the thumbs up. So let’s get back to the car itself.

I am not a fan of SUVs. I actually agree that big SUVs need to be banned from CBDs. Nonetheless I absolutely adore the Hummer. This is a car built for one reason - to look good.

You don’t buy a Hummer because you want to go off-road or because you want practicality and lots of room. Nor do you buy it because it has massive ground clearance and the ability to overcome tough terrain - you get all that for free, what you’re really paying for is the Hummer badge and the looks. And it’s well worth it.

I never thought I’d be saying this about an American car, but starting from just $51,990, the Hummer H3 is a bargain.

You can of course go buy a base model Ford Territory, Holden Captiva or Toyota Kluger for around 40k, and many do, but not only are all those cars incapable off-road, but they blend into the background like Kevin Rudd at a Star Trek convention.

Investing in a Hummer is not like any other SUV, you have to consider the repercussions। Are you willing to entertain the 100 people that ask you questions each week? Are you willing to give kids the thumbs up when they wave? What about the already-mentioned negativity? For me, the answer is simple - absolutely.

Driving around town the Hummer is very well behaved, parking is made easy with a turning circle that betters that of Ford’s Territory.

As expected there is noticeable body roll when pushing hard into a corner but for general driving, you really wouldn’t notice it.

The main problem I found with the H3 is visibility. Sure everyone else on the road can spot a yellow Hummer from 2km away, but can you spot them?

Shoulder checking is practically useless as the Hummer-style short windows do little to help. As for reverse parking, by all means tick the parking-sensors box (standard on luxury) on the options list. You’ll need it. The H3 recently received 0 stars from the NRMA for its rerward visability .

The interior is a surprise. I expected some cheap American rubbish with safety warnings telling you to “avoid death”. You still get the safety nonsense but you also get a well finished and practical interior with a superb stereo.

The CD-player in the base model played MP3s and standard CDs, but the Luxury variant’s stereo failed to read the same MP3 disc. For some bizarre reason, the six-disc CD-player upgrade that you get with the Luxury and Adventure models cannot play MP3s!

The chrome centre console appears a little tacky at first, but it grows on you. As for the sunroof in the Luxury variant, it is easily the largest sunroof I’ve ever encountered. It is just enormous. You can almost call the H3 a convertible with it open.

As for the steering wheel, it upgrades to leather when you hit the Luxury grade, but it could do with a little more… bling.

From the outside there is no denying this car is American, it truly does capture everything we love about our closest ally, its big, bold and some will argue even beautiful। I won’t go that far.

Safety is taken care of by dual front airbags with passenger sensing system and curtain bags, as well as StabiliTrak® electronic stability control system, traction control, ABS and dynamic rear proportioning brakes, all of which come standard on all H3 variants.

Picking between the Luxury and the base model can be hard for some but the Luxury has been the best-seller so far. The standard H3 doesn’t get the leather seats, sunroof, chrome mirrors etc, but it’s still my pick, simply because I would buy the manual.

Sitting inside the H3 is a pleasant experience, you can’t feel the bumps and there is minimal noise inside the cabin. As for the stereo, think Pimp my Ride and you won’t be disappointed.

The H3 is not without its problems though. Apart from visibility it has one other large problem, it can’t tow. With a towing capacity of 1360kg, it is the equivalent of a Holden Astra and is easily beaten by the likes of a standard 3.6-litre VE Commodore that can manage 2100kg. It’s also hard to get into if you’re vertically challenged.

“Can you live with it everyday?” Sure you can, it’s not fun in traffic, but it’s manageable. Want my advice? Don’t buy the H3 to replace your primary vehicle, it’s not the sort of car you want to leave in a shopping centre car park - trust me.

But if you want to be noticed, there is no other car this side of $60,000 that will do it like a Hummer H3. What you really need to do is have about $5000 set aside for a set of 22-inch rims and the darkest possible tint, because really, that’s what a Hummer is all about.

The H3 is available in three variants – the H3, H3 Luxury and H3 Adventure.

H3: $51,990 (manual) $53,990 (automatic)

Features: Cruise control, electro-chromatic rearview mirror with eight point compass, power windows, fog lights and halogen headlamps, five 16 x 7.5 inch alloy wheels, remote entry with panic alarm, single in-dash CD, cloth seats and 60/40 split rear seats.

H3 Luxury: $59,990 (automatic)

Features: All features from entry model plus automatic transmission as standard, leather seat inserts, electric heated front seats with eight way power adjustment, leather wrapped steering wheel, exterior chrome package including door handles, roof cross bars and mirror caps, six-disc in-dash CD Monsoon sound system and glass sunroof.

H3 Adventure: $57,990 (manual) $59,990 (automatic)

Features: Manual transmission as standard (optional automatic), the same level of specification as the Luxury model (excluding sunroof), adding a fully locking electronic rear differential and heavy duty two-speed transfer case with a super low range ratio of 4।03:1.

But the real beauty of this box on wheels, is not the bold, overstated looks. Nor is it the glances and wonderment that comes from onlookers. It’s what this thing can actually do when asked.

In discussion with several hardcore four-wheel-drivers, the H3 was seen as a pretender। All flash, no substance। Which meant a challenge was on the cards। It called for an off-road excursion, with seasoned contenders। Would the Hummer’s independent front suspension help, or hinder? Is the body up to the task? Would ground clearance be a problem? All would be answered during a day spent on Perth’s Powerline Track।

Starting at Mundaring Weir Road, and heading off into the Darling Ranges until who-knows-where, the Powerline Track is a mix of sand, gravel, rocks and mud. Straight, flatter sections can be tacked by softroaders, but the ascents and descents are another story all together.

Each segment of climb is separated into an easy-way-out (commonly known as a “chicken track”) and one or two difficult sections. Making the task all the more interesting is the marble gravel - common in these parts - which litters the path, effectively reducing your grip to levels akin to sneakers on ice. You either have to have a lot of skill, or have a damned good stability control system. I’m hoping, then, the H3’s stability control won’t let me down. . .